Thursday, June 14, 2012

No! Noch Nisht! Nevermore!

Recently, one of the most intriguing bloggers posted a rendition of Poe's "The Raven" in Yiddish.

I posted the following comment there, but since OTML has moved on with a new post about Rav Yaakov Yosef ZTL, I'm afraid the comment will get buried and never see the light of day. For those who have had some smattering of a secular education, I share the following:


Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary, Over many an online hebrewbooks volume of forgotten lore, While I nodded, trying to stay up, suddenly there came a popup, vying for my inattentive Kup, promising not to bore. `'Tis not a virus,' I muttered, `wondering what it's for- Only this, and nothing more.'

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, `Google,' said I, `or IE, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was learning, and so gently you came whirling, And so faintly you came hurling, redirecting me to Bloggers store, That I scarce was sure I saw you' - here I clicked-could not ignore; - Darkness then, and nothing more!

Deep into that black screen peering, long I sat there wondering, fearing, Doubting, feeling fears no mortal ever dared to feel before; 'Cuz now my PC was broken, and the darkness gave no token, Now I was fully woken, How would I learn for evermore? This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the words, Al Gore! Merely this and nothing more.

Then I recalled that Al had created, the superhighway and even paved it, With routers and relays for my information to flow o'er; While jetting the world, using fuel, he made me feel like a fool, For using electricity for my tool - instead of having saved it. These thoughts crossed my mind as I set my computer on the floor. You shall be revived! and serve once more!

Now that I had time to waken, I tried a path that few had taken, The road less travelled seemed to beckon, my spirit began to soar; For I remembered Rabbi Reisman, lecturing as a Technical Wise-man, Flash drive booting is an option, when your computer works no more. Quick as a flash I ubuntued it, and it began to purr. Hebrewbooks shall rule once more!

And until this day I'm sitting, e-learning which is fitting. For a generation that is glued to gadgets and the itunes store. But on occasion, when I'm weak, I'll even sneak a little peak, At the best blogs of the week, posted by Rafi - just can't ignore. OnTheMainLine ranks up there, with the best there ever were. All must thank VP Al Gore.


  1. This is fantastic! You really have a talent.

  2. fantastic! brilliant! borderline genius . you got all the cadences. I could hear it being voiced as i read it.

    better than any 20 of your "Quad lettered" headings. Now I've got to click the link and read the Yiddish version. Sick and tired of the timeneh treifineh sfas haMedinah.

    Startled at the Lashon Hara smitten by Quad lettered posts so aptly written,
    "Doubtless," said I, "what he utters is his only stock and store,
    Caught from some strident mentor , whom, unmerciful upon dissenters
    Chastised vents and chastised venters, till his alliteratives one burden bore,---
    Till the dirges of his hope that Pollyanish burden bore
    Of "Never Lashon Hara...nevermore."

  3. As usual, Bray says it 10 times better than I ever could.

  4. Thanks BOF and HK.

    I need the Cliff notes, though, Bray, to understand your verse.

    Incidentally, you are my strident mentor.

    And I thought you'd probably appreciate the Raven's calligraphic graphic more than the verse.

  5. I am a big fan of Poe in particular The Raven, Hop-Frog and the Masque of the Red Death.

    The passage of the poem that I reworked to gift you in my prior comment goes as follows:

    Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
    "Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store,
    Caught from some unhappy master, whom unmerciful disaster
    Followed fast and followed faster, till his songs one burden bore,---
    Till the dirges of his hope that melancholy burden bore
    Of "Never---nevermore."

  6. Cliff Notes:

    To vent= to rage, rant complain usually loudly with great embellishment about / against people and institutions. IOW LH, Rechilus and Motzeee shem Rah. So the mentor chastises IOW gives tokhokha about vents= LH and Venters= מספרי לשון הרע.
    his alliteratives = your quad lettered titles and word-play turn-of-phrases.

    let me know if any more pirushim are needed

  7. hebrewbooks - the great website with over 50,000 online sefarim available free.

    Al Gore - Former Vice President. Famous for claiming to have invented the Internet. Went on to become infamous for attending Green Earth conferences that focused on saving the planet from Global Warming while jetting there on a private jet.

    Superhighway - another presidential term. Information Super-Highway is the complete nomenclature. Internet infrastructure.

    The road less travelled - Famous poem by fellow American poet - Robert Frost. Probably meant to contra-distinct from Mississippi Fred's blog which is un-aptly named On The Main Line, when his blog is most definitely off the beaten path.

    Rabbi Reisman - Popular speaker and Rav in Flatbush who spoke recently on the topic of Internet/Computer security.

    Rafi - Rafi Goldmeier - proprietor of the popular Blog. His blog roundups feature the important posts of the week.

    VP Al Gore. See above. Almost became president of the United States with running-mate Joe Lieberman. Was not elected or selected.

  8. Ahh, that is really nice! Thank you!

  9. Speaking of Poe, when I was a kid "The Gold Bug" was where it was at for me. That code! Genius.

  10. Probably meant to contra-distinct from Mississippi Fred's blog which is un-aptly named On The Main Line, when his blog is most definitely off the beaten path.

    S., Do you have a Teretz to this Ha'aroh?

  11. Wiki:

    Poe played a major role in popularizing cryptograms in newspapers and magazines in his time period and beyond. William F. Friedman, America's foremost cryptologist, initially became interested in cryptography after reading "The Gold-Bug" as a child - interest he later put to use in deciphering Japan's PURPLE code during World War II


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